7:30 am: roll out of bed and onto the couch, turn TV on, and watch as Amazing takes place. United to finish Chelsea off 1-0 at the Bridge. Championship is sewn up.
10:00 am: roll off couch and into boots. Go outside and play as though Ronaldo and Rooney could learn a thing or two. Claim every shank was a calculated curl. Well done.
12:00 pm: Beer #1 and some tasty. Watch some highlight videos on YouTube (Michael Caine’s Goals Galore should do to start) and slowly start working yourself up for the TFC match. Didn’t take much, did it?
2:00 pm: Beer #Perfection, and make your way to BMO. Sing out loud, everyone loves your voice. Especially neighbours as you pass.
2:45 pm: Arrive at BMO, Queue for Beer #Perfect +1.
3:30 pm: Delight in the fact that you’re about to see TFC history. (Beer #Perfection +4, btw.)
5:30 pm: TFC is one game over .500. You’ve earned it just as much as the players on field, delight in the fact that we’re moving up.
6:00 pm: Clean yourself up, it’s been a long day and you look like crap. Except that smile, it’s amazing. Take it to the bar and show it off a little.
